Sleep deprivation is a risk factor for developing postnatal anxiety and depression, but babies are not known for sleeping well – and with this comes broken sleep for their whānau. ‘Sleep when baby sleeps’ is the traditional advice, and while it holds some wisdom, it is often not enough. Good support, sharing the load, and knowing that this will not last forever, are key to surviving.
Safe sleep for baby is important, and part of that is to sleep in the same room as a parent for at least the first six months of life – but babies can be noisy sleepers! Some parents will take ‘shifts’ at night so that each parent gets at least some uninterrupted sleep. This is possible even if you are breastfeeding your baby, as the ‘awake’ parent can change baby, bring them to you for feeding, and settle them again afterward, so you only need to do the actual feed. Having a sleeping space in a separate room can help with this.
If someone offers to watch baby while you sleep, and you feel safe doing this, take up the offer! Getting sleep how and when you can is essential in the ‘newborn trenches’.
Housework can wait! Bare minimum is all you need to be doing, and if someone else offers to do some for you, take them up on it if you can. As long as you and baby have some clean clothes to wear, and something to eat, everything else can go on hold or be passed on to a support person.